Better than watching the Nets

February 22, 2010

Way to Go: Andrea Bargnani

October 28, 2009


Way to go Andrea Bargnani.

The much criticized 1st selection of the 2006 NBA Draft, scored 28 points adding 5 rebounds, one steal and one block in the October 28th matchup with the Cleveland Cavaliers.

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Season Preview: Toronto Raptors

October 5, 2009
Note to future NBA franchise owners: don't listen to nerds.

Note to future NBA franchise owners: don't listen to nerds.


The Toronto Raptors are one of the younger franchises in the NBA, but they have had some success, namely drafting Vince Carter in the 1998 Draft. Of their fourteen seasons, they have had five winning seasons, which doesn’t sound like a lot, but they are just two shy of matching the Clippers’ number of winning seasons, who have been around for thirty nine seasons.

The Toronto Terriers: not remotely terrifying

The Toronto Terriers: not remotely terrifying.

The Raptors were a unique addition to the NBA: they, along with the Vancouver Grizzlies, were the first Canadian teams and Toronto was the first to be buoyed by a bunch of nerds. Allow me to explain that last part. Many people wonder about the origin of the Raptors’ team nickname, but very few know the true story. As most new franchises decide to enter the league, they usually hold a naming contest to help generate excitement for the new team and ease pressure on the marketing executives to pick a good team name. Toronto was no exception, receiving over 2,000 different entries. A shortlist of the ten “best” ideas were released to the public: Beavers, Bobcats, Dragons, Grizzlies, Hogs, Raptors, Scorpions, T-Rex, Tarantulas, and Terriers. If only our exclusive “Inside the Name” series had been released many years ago to aid their decision, they would have eliminated lame names like the Beavers, Hogs (apparently, one of Toronto’s nicknames is “Hogtown”), and Terriers, but even without our groundbreaking series, they seemed to be heading in the right direction with the slew of terrifying nicknames at their disposal.

Alas, the “Raptors” moniker was chosen for the popularity of the Jurassic Park movie, which was released in 1993, which nerds embraced with open arms. In the seven months that followed the team name announcement in 1994, the Raptors were seventh in merchandise sales, despite the fact that they had not even played a single game. My suggestion to future NBA franchises: while this was a success story (largely because “the Raptors” is such a badass team nickname), don’t listen to nerds, or else we’ll end up with terrible, terrible names, like the Vancouver Vampires or the Honolulu Harry Potters.

Don't let this guy be the face of your franchise.

Don't let this guy be the face of your franchise.

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Take On Me

August 26, 2009


I can’t decide which I like more, Chris Bosh’s personality off of the court or his game on it. Admittedly, I wasn’t what some would describe as a believer of his comic knack until I saw his pitch/commercial to be voted in the All-Star game in the 2007-08 season down in the Bayou. His seamless southern drawl is evidence of his roots while producing perhaps my favorite infomercial of all time, Bosh sporting a Cowboy hat and pleading for viewers to exercise their right to vote creating laughter and enjoyment for all. I feel that part of the enjoyment for me was the unexpectedness of the entire concept, mostly because of Bosh’s unassuming nature on the court.

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Hedo the Hero

July 10, 2009


One glance at Hedo Turkoglu’s face and you instantly recognize that this is more than a simple man from Europe. This is a man beseeched by his own talents to perform at a high level, the best player to ever cross the Atlantic from the glorious nation of Turkey. A father that plays better on the road than at home because of the noise the baby makes during the night. A 6’10” forward who is more than comfortable with bringing the ball up the court and has a streaky shot that can light up a scoreboard.

At times, a smile will grace the face of Hedo, with a grin stretching from one ear to the other. Other times, a look of boredom bordering on depression covers the mug of Hedo. After a big shot, Hedo will jog down the court with his tongue hanging out like a dog in Texas heat. It seems fitting; after all, he has been called the Michael Jordan of Turkey, with no other viable candidates to compete for the honor.

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The Turkoglu Turnover

July 4, 2009


Wow, well this is more surprising than the fat content in non-fat yogurt. Hedo Turkoglu has decided to not sign with the Portland Trailblazers and instead will play for the Toronto Raptors. He had an apparent change of heart after agreeing with Portland to help with the up and coming team. He has instead chosen to sign with Toronto and a more international friendly team.

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Inside the Name Part 1

June 30, 2009

When it comes to naming a team in the National Basketball Association, in my opinion, the name can fall in any one of five categories. Unbeknownst to many so-called “fans” of basketball, there is an unspoken hierarchy among the various team names. Well, unspoken until now. In a “Paints in the Point” exclusive, we go…


Part 1: Animals

While the most desirable type of nickname for a basketball team, selecting which ferocious animal can be challenging.

Some sort of wildcat is an obvious choice, but team owners must be careful, as they tread the fine line of ferocious killing machine and cuter, smaller cats that are more likely to lightly scratch a person than maul them to death. A team selecting the latter type of mascot is likely to be mocked and banished to the WNBA.

Tiger: Ferocious Killing Machine

Tiger: Ferocious Killing Machine

Lynx: Adorable

Lynx: Adorable

(Photo Credits: Save China’s TigersNorbert Rosing, National Geographic)

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