Inside the Name Part 1

June 30, 2009

When it comes to naming a team in the National Basketball Association, in my opinion, the name can fall in any one of five categories. Unbeknownst to many so-called “fans” of basketball, there is an unspoken hierarchy among the various team names. Well, unspoken until now. In a “Paints in the Point” exclusive, we go…

INSIDE THE NAME

Part 1: Animals

While the most desirable type of nickname for a basketball team, selecting which ferocious animal can be challenging.

Some sort of wildcat is an obvious choice, but team owners must be careful, as they tread the fine line of ferocious killing machine and cuter, smaller cats that are more likely to lightly scratch a person than maul them to death. A team selecting the latter type of mascot is likely to be mocked and banished to the WNBA.

Tiger: Ferocious Killing Machine

Tiger: Ferocious Killing Machine

Lynx: Adorable

Lynx: Adorable

(Photo Credits: Save China’s TigersNorbert Rosing, National Geographic)

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The Houston Rockets Explained

June 29, 2009

houstonrockets

The Rockets are a team that defies most explanations. Their chemistry should not exist with T-Mac, Yao, Battier, and Artest who are all very different players with very different ways of playing the game. The only way to fully explicate the eccentricities of each of the players is to compare them to countries and/or nations around the world.

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The Natural

June 26, 2009

IASIP

Born in Seattle, Washington, Brandon Dawayne Roy (sic) was born to play the game of basketball. After struggling with the ACT, Roy finally reached the score needed to play in Division I basketball. He chose college basketball over early entry into the Association and signed with the hometown Washington Huskies where he teamed up with Nate Robinson. After his junior season in 2005, Roy nearly entered the draft again, but realizing that teammate Robinson and the Huskies’ top recruit were both forgoing the 2006 season to go pro, he stuck around for one more year. The extra experience helped and vaulted his draft stock in the 2006 draft. Read the rest of this entry »


Live Blogging Picks 7-60 of the 2009 NBA Draft

June 25, 2009

We (The Custodian, The Franchise, The Freelancer) are at The Champ’s house. The following will be an approximate representation of what happened.

8:11 PM: Discussing the virtues of having Shaq on the Cleveland Cavaliers with The Franchise. He thinks he is the only one who has doubts about Shaq with the Cavs, but The Freelancer reassures him that he is not alone.

8:12 PM: The Champ wants to “put money” on Curry going to the Knicks with #8 pick in the draft.

8:15 PM: The Champ and The Franchise love Kevin Durant.

8:16 PM: Curry to the Warriors. “The Knicks got robbed.” The Champ claims that the Knicks’ plan is entirely ruined with the Warriors’ pick.

8:19 PM: The room is treated to a Champ gun show.

8:21 PM: Jordan Hill to the Knicks. “Holy cow, he’s huge.” “I can see this guy being good.”

8:24 PM: Jordan Hill = Donté Stallworth? You be the judge:

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Cupid’s Couples

June 25, 2009

steveandamare

Sometimes in the Association, two players will meet at one junction or another on a team and true chemistry will form. These are the top 12 pairs of players in the league right now, duos that complement each other’s capabilities on the court.

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The Draft

June 25, 2009

joakimnoah

The annual NBA draft is already upon us and we are nowhere near ready to fully comprehend the magnitude of greatness or stupidity that each of the teams will achieve Thursday night. Every year, teams will pick out a player among the hundreds available to either lay the foundation for their franchise, or to sew up any loose ends. Often, however, they will make a critical mistake that could cost them in the long run and be mocked nationally on radio shows. You could draft the next Michael Jordan, or the next Chris Mihm.

So, with the first pick, whom do the Los Angeles Clippers choose to be their favorite disappointment? Read the rest of this entry »


The Canadian Flash

June 22, 2009

stevenash

Steve Nash may just be my favorite player in the entire Association. He is the greatest Canadian export since Celine Dion. The way he goes about playing the game of basketball is not only pleasing to the eyes, its also pleasing to statisticians and basketball purists. A modern day Bob Cousy, Nash glides around the court with ease and has all the tools necessary for him to be one of the greatest point guards of all time.

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